I didn’t catch gay from a toilet seat,
I caught it when for the first time a girl smiled at me and I knew why.
I didn’t catch gay from playing with G.I. Joes,
I caught it from the secret longing I got when I looked at the other girls around me.
I didn’t catch gay from the girl’s locker room,
But I did feel the shame when I hid my eyes so that I wouldn’t get caught staring too long.
I didn’t catch gay from not wearing dresses,
I caught it from staring at the girls wearing the dresses and becoming aroused.
I didn’t catch gay from other gay women,
I caught it from feeling the soft lips of a woman pressed up against mine.
I didn’t catch gay from hearing about “gays” from the school board.
But I did learn to hide who I really was lest I get beat up like the “fag” did at lunchtime or recess.
I didn’t catch gay from TV.
Nor did I catch straight from watching all of the straight couples that flooded the TV screen.
I didn’t catch gay from a parade,
I caught it from seeing a naked woman at my side that shared the same feelings I had.
I didn’t catch gay from hugging women,
But I learned not to let my hugs linger too long, and I became distant and cold to women in general.
I didn’t catch gay like some air borne disease,
Even though I am treated as such, if I dare tell who I really am.
I didn’t catch gay from going to a gay bar,
I caught it when I realized that I wasn’t the only one with an attraction to the same sex.
I didn’t catch gay from cutting my hair,
I caught it from feeling another woman place her hands in a soft and gentle way in my innermost places.
I didn’t catching gay from hanging around “Faggots” or “Dykes”,
I caught it when they accepted me for who I am, when I was brave enough to tell them.
I didn’t catch gay from hearing gay related “issues” on the news,
But I realized it was important for me to hide my own issues, lest they become public knowledge too.
I didn’t catch gay because my parents failed to instill on me the importance of a monogamous heterosexual relationship,
I caught gay when I looked around and saw that I didn’t know very many monogamous heterosexual people.
I didn’t catch gay by swimming in a pool with other gay people,
I caught it when my inner feelings about women matched what my body was actually doing with them.
I didn’t catch gay from sharing a drinking fountain with women.
But I did learn that people don’t really want to share personal body space with me, just in case they catch gay from me.
I didn’t catch gay from one of my friends.
Although in my effort to pretend I was straight I ostracized them and turned my back on them.
I didn’t catch gay from watching a movie with a homosexual couple in it,
But I did learn that there were people like me in this world.
So if you please forgive me, I’ve tried to explain myself as best I could,
I didn’t catch gay at all.
It was always just a part of who I was.
~ Author Unknown