Well, it has been such a long time since I wrote anything here. There is so much to report on. Where do I begin?

First, on May 12, Arnold arrived in Canada. What a thrill it was to greet him at the airport. About that time I was at the airport it seemed almost twice a week seeing someone off or waiting to meet someone. He meant it when he said he was letting his hair grow until he got to Canada.

Second, I had a double birthday/pre-retirement celebration on July 19 and 20. On the 19th at Pegasus, there were many well wishers and wonderful decorations. I was very pleased with the way everyone was so pleasant. At Mark's on the 20th, I got to meet Grace and we had a wonderful time. People think retirement should come immediately upon turning 65 but alas I am going to go to January 1, 2009 so I can say I have been at Laurier from 1969 to 2009.

Thirdly, I am moving to a 2-bedroom apartment looking south towards the lake. It is more a city view but one can see the lake through or between the buildings.

Finally, I have done Ottawa twice - once for an LYC event in May and once the long August weekend. The first time was just up and back in a day. The second was for overnight.

Until after the move I will be so busy it will be difficult to keep writing but alas I will update again in September.

This is a beautiful movie with Sean Hoagland and Owen Alabado, two young men in a small coastal town who fall in love.Brady, the character played by Hoagland, is highly religious and tries running from his feelings for Clifford (Alabado) throughout the movie. Yet, the pastor, played by David Lewis, the writer as well quotes John 3:17 "God did not send His son to condemn the world ..." to Brady which makes Brady decide not to go to an ex-gay camp. The movie deals with Brady coming out to his mother, his mother having difficulty with Brady's homosexuality but saying "you will always be my son" but also admitting that she can not change the way she thinks.

The scenery, both nature and human is absolutely spectactular. The message is one worth pursuing. It would be an excellent movie at 72 minutes to show to a gay and lesbian group - a gay-straight alliance or at a church group dealing with sexuality. It would be my hope that it will reach beyond gays to those who often condemn gays.

I generally read the on-line version of Christianity Today magazine daily and I found this article particularly useful. I am copying it whole, not to break copyright, but to show you that I agree with the thoughts and message conveyed therein.

Hour of Decision
"How can I know I'm a Christian if I can't remember when I first responded to the gospel?"
Erik Thoennes |



My favorite question to ask Christians is how they came to trust in Christ. The answers I've heard testify to the diverse experiences God uses to bring people into a relationship with himself. Most commonly, people say they trusted him as a child at camp or at Sunday school or while praying with a parent. They often follow with something like, "But my faith really became my own when I was a junior in high school."

How are we to understand this variety of experiences and the apparent two-stage process many seem to undergo in arriving at saving faith?

The term saved is popularly used to refer to regeneration and justification. But when the Bible uses the word salvation in a spiritual sense, it describes the broad range of God's activity in rescuing people from sin and restoring them to a right relationship with himself. Salvation in the Bible thus has past, present, and future tenses. A believer has been saved from the guilt of sin (justification, see Eph. 2:8), is being saved from the power of sin (sanctification, see 1 Cor. 1:18), and will be saved from the judgment and presence of sin (glorification, see Acts 15:11).

While the subjective experience of being saved may look very different from person to person, the objective state of being saved is definite and absolute. From God's perspective, there is a definitive point in time when those who have trusted in Christ pass from death into life (1 John 3:14).

Whether or not one can remember the moment of spiritual rebirth, it is a miracle that initiates a number of new realities. Through the work of the Holy Spirit in regeneration, the spiritually dead person is made alive in Christ (Titus 3:5). The convert's filthy rags of self-righteousness have been traded for the perfect righteousness of Christ (Phil. 3:8-9). He or she can cease striving to be justified, resting instead in the finished work of Christ (Phil. 2:8-9). As Paul writes, "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" (Rom. 8:1). The believer has "crossed over from death to life" (John 5:24), which means the person can "have confidence on the day of judgment" (1 John 4:17).

Much of American Protestantism has been influenced by revivalism, which places great emphasis on "making a decision for Christ" in a public, definitive way. These "moments of decision" often become the crucial evidence that one is saved. Other Protestant traditions, less influenced by revivalism (including some Reformed and Lutheran churches), may be content to leave the conversion experience unclearly identified, putting the focus on identification with the church. Both of these traditions have benefits, as well as potential problems.

The decision approach rightly emphasizes the need for a personal commitment to Jesus Christ and the idea that regeneration takes place at a specific time. The potential downside is that this view can lead to a simplistic, human-centered understanding of being saved, where one depends too heavily on the specific act of trusting Christ as the primary evidence of conversion. As a result, one can doubt the "decision" was real, leading to numerous journeys down the aisle (just in case). Also, one can depend on the walk down the aisle alone, even in the absence of spiritual fruit.

On the other hand, Reformed traditions appreciate the sovereignty of God and the role of the church in the salvation process. Yet they can leave conversion so vague that the need for personal trust in Christ and a changed life is neglected.

We must allow for the varied experiences God uses to bring people to himself. As C. H. Spurgeon said, "The Spirit calls men to Jesus in diverse ways. Some are drawn so gently that they scarcely know when the drawing began, and others are so suddenly affected that their conversion stands out with noonday clearness."

For those who question their salvation, the best evidence is not the memory of having raised a hand or prayed a prayer. Nor is it having been baptized or christened. The true test of the authentic work of God in one's life is growth in Christ-like character, increased love for God and other people, and the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-25; James 2:18). A memorable conversion experience may serve as an important referent to God's saving work in one's life. But the ongoing work of the Holy Spirit in making a person more like Jesus is the clearest indicator that one has been made a new creation in Christ.

Erik Thoennes is associate professor of theology at Talbot School of Theology, Biola University.

I will start with Christmas Day in 2006. My sister, Mary Lynn and I had been inviting each other to our places since I left my marriage in 2000. In 2006, she announced that she would be in Edmonton for Christmas, instead of celebrating here in Toronto area. I decided since I was going to be alone and wanted a turkey and all, I would invite some friends whoo would not have others to celebrate with over. I invited four people, one of whom was invited elsewhere so there were four of who sat down to the meal - I cooked everything and enjoyed it.

This year, with my sister deciding to hold Christmas dinner in her birthday December 23, I hesitated about what to do. This year, I felt I wanted to do it again but felt daunted at the thought. I am President of the Toronto Long Yang Club (Asian gays and their admirers). I had not made up my mind when I attended our Christmas pot luck a couple of weeks ago but I was talking to one of the young Asians whom is not long in Canada and asked him what he was doing for Christmas and he said he was not doing anything and so I told him I was thinking of having dinner here. Another fellow (African background) was standing there and said "I will bring the turkey" so I said, it is a deal. I then talked to two other Asians and asked them and they said they would come.

I then invited the people who were here last year and it expanded until I had invited 11 of whom 10 were able to come. Two left after dinner and two more came after dinner (partners separated by distance who wanted to have dinner together) so 10 left late evening. Mainland China, Indonesia, Malaysia, India, Pakistan, USA, Philippines, and of course Canada were the birth places of those present and the turkey-provider - I do not know what country he was born in (his parents were diplomats so he lived all over).

It makes for a very different Christmas from when my three sons were growing up and it wqs a nuclear family but it makes an excellent one. I don't think we know how many people do not have people at Christmas to connect with.

Laughter and fun were had by all and one person brought a mango salad, dessert was provided by another and that kept my job down to vegies, jello, buns (and there are some I would not have minded touching either) and drink. I must say, it really made my Christmas special.

MCC Toronto Christmas Eve Service is one of the nicest events in my year.

This year, with the possibility of Arnold being here for Christmas, I wondered about buying him a ticket but by the time I got to Roy Thompson Hall to buy the ticket I knew he would not be here.

Anyway, the music is always superb. The sermons are short a pithy. Politicians are always present - inlcuding the leader of one of the political parties and members from other parties.

Last night, the first song was so wonderful. It had as its theme - we are free to love whomever, no matter race, colour, or ..... Ms. Pirtre who played in Mamma Mia on Broadway and in the Toronto production was one of the featured singers. Someone described the service to me before I went as like a Broadway production. This was my 8th straight year of attending and it is always so nice to see young gay couples with both sets of parents in tow - not something which would have happened in my younger days.

The sermon was brief but made the point that Christ was about LOVE and just like the song emphasized the need to be inclusive. It hit out at the fundamentalists of all faiths and their deviation from the LOVE of Christ. The title had to do with what each of us can do - Christ was one person and He was inclusive and hit out at the fundamentalists of His day. We are to be like Christ.

What a message! As gay Christians we have to doubly work on this. One of the finer statements made during the service had to do with, it was time to fight the lack of love in our world instead of fighting terrorism. That drew applause.

Visit to Grand Rapids MI

On Friday Dec. 14, I arose early and started on my way to Grand Rapids MI. I had worried Thursday afternoon about the poor weather (particularly around Buffalo). The roads were fine.

It took me just over 6 hours to make the drive. I stopped for breakfast at Bob Evans in Port Huron. I had forgotten to bring any of the favourite CDs so had talk radio on most the way.

I checked into Americinn, Greenville. I then phoned both Trevor and Allison\s cell phones and hooked up my laptop to let people know I had arrived safely.

Soon the telephone rang asking me to come to the house. I drove right there and enjoyed a beautiful afternoon until after dinner. The house is lovely with furnishings in it and with Joshua's room finished. I admired the fact I had helped with the painting before the carpet and the furnishings went in.

I agreed to return the next morning at about 9:00 to 10:00 with some salad ingredients. I got there just after 10 after a wonderful breakfast and a chat on-line with Arnold plus of course some shopping. I had to get gas at Meijer Stores and did the grocery shopping at Walmart.

On Saturday, I spent the day with the family. Samantha actually sat in my lap some although she is still very shy about me. She stares and stares at me most the time when I speak to her. She was amazed in the afternoon as we played board games that I could deliver her cereal to nibble on just as much as Daddy could.

We went to Halfway Restaurant without incident. The wind was coming up and it was supposed to start snowing but it held off. Right after dinner, I headed back to the Americinn and they went home to put the little ones to bed. Church, which we had planned to go to in the evening was cancelled because of major winter storm warning.

Sunday morning, I made the decision to stay an extra night. When I looked out the window at my car I could see that the snow had drifted. Sid, Alexander, Arthur and Ernie had warned me not to come home.


Arnold and I had another wonderful chat. I expected to have breakfast with Trevor, Allison, and the kids. However, after chatting with Arnold - again, a wonderful chat, I went down and had a small snack to tide me over. The breakfasts at that Americinn are very good.

The road out to Trevor's was terrible. Had I been driving home, which had been my intention, it would probably have taken 24 hours at the rate I managed out to Trevor's.

He was out shovelling. I took a few hands at the shovel - first time in 8 winters. The wind was whipping things around.

We played Trivia Pursuit while Joshua and Claire were in basement watching Christmas programs on TV - later, I watched some with them. Cute children's programs.

After lunch, Trevor ventured out to shovel again. I did a bit more this time and we took pictures of the kids in the snow and of me shovelling (to share with Arnold) and such before I headed back to the motel for a lengthy nap. Trevor had taken the red eye back from San Francisco on Wednesday night so he was showing signs that he needed to rest and sleep.

We met at a Mexican Restaurant for dinner. Yes, Grandpa decided he ought to treat them to a second meal as he had not anticipated staying. Grandpa also handed over birthday and Christmas presents.

Joshua started immediately eating the salsa and chips too quickly and threw up as we were ordering our food.

We ordered and Allison kept telling Joshua to slow down in his eating. However, near the end of his meal, he threw up - this time a much bigger mess. We left the restaurant hurriedly and stopped back at the motel where we said good-byes in front of the lobby fire. That Greenville Americinn has a really nice lobby. I took some pictures and got them to take some of me with the grandchildren. They then said goodnight. I note Trevor is using one of the pictures I took of the whole family on his web site.

The drive home on Monday was mostly on dry roads. The snow and roads were worst around Flint, Sarnia, and Burlington. Just east of Sarnia, I saw cars and an 18-wheeler being pulled from the ditches. Obviously left overs from the previous day. I stopped at a drug store in morning. I stopped for lunch and gas (again at Bob Evans) in Port Huron. I stopped at Duty Free and finally made it home 7 hours after leaving Greenville.

The visits with Mark's family and Trevor's family made my Christmas.

DJ

Monday visit to family

On Monday, December 10, I visited Mark, Wendy, and Anna. They are a neat family. Mark is my son, Anna is his 2-year old daughter, and Wendy is Mark's wife and Anna's mother. Mark and I talked in the morning and after lunch we went down to the basement and assembled some copper piping for the new bathroom down there. He is putting in an additional bedroom in the basement as well.

It takes me three hours to get there and three hours to get home and so it makes a long day for me. At this time of year, going north on the highways can be speculative at best. I started out in the snow flurries and had visibility problems with the windshield washer fluid not working properly going up but coming home it was actually more scary to me since it was so dark and there was absolutely no lights anywhere and I was on a lonely twisting highway.

It is fun to watch grandchildren grow up. Anna is a smart little one. She is 27 months and she talks very clearly, can count, say the alphabet, etc. Obviously, Wendy is teaching her all the time. At one store, I was in the car alone with Anna and she carries on an adult conversation very well.

Since when I go to see my other grandchildren, I spend time there (I have to drive six hours to get there), I try to see Mark's family six times a year. It does not always work out but it does some of the time.

One thing which reallys truck me was a comment Mark made. We were talking about schooling for Anna and he made a comment about his going to pre-school. I told him it was Montessori and he asked if it was because his mother did not want him home or some other reason. As soon as he said that about his mother not wanting him home, I broke out laughing. He had his answer. I felt badly as I try not to say anything against their mother - she is their mother but I could not help laughing that he had figured it out.

I did not leave my spouse because of being gay. I left her because she became abusive to me after the boys left home. She had first been abusive to herself (suicide attempts) and then the house and finally me. I know she was abusive to Bryan but I really do not think she was abusive to Mark or Trevor. She did send them to camp (both day and summer) and to pre-school, etc. even when we could not afford it. I am fascinated that the boys are beginning to realize it.

It seems foolish to say this but I do care about my ex. - she is terrible need of help which I tried to give her and get for her but it ended up a lost cause. I got to the point where I would shake when I got in the car to go home. I am so much better off now - with a boyfriend, Arnold T. who is waiting to come from the Philippines to live with me, with my first boyfriend Bob L. who taught me to be honest and open after clamming up with my spouse but who died all too early.

Being gay is nothing to ashamed of. I am 1 woman short of being 100% gay but I am glad I had the opportunity to be a father and still live to have a male lover. I think God intended me to be a gay father/grandfather.

It seems a big jump to go from the Philippines to Kenya but after returning from four weeks in Asia In January/February 2007, I headed off to Europe and Africa. The ultimate destination for me was Nairobi where I am involved in a research project.

First, let me explain the background of how I got involved in research in Kenya. One of my former students (a mature student about 5 years younger than me) became a naturopath (Jim). His children and mine were in church groups together. His youngest son went to Kenya about 4 years ago as a summer mission and met a Pentecostal pastor there who put him in touch with a mission run by a Norwegian couple. They have a orphange and a place where slum children gather daily to be prepared for school. The mission then pays for uniforms and books for the kids who prepare for school under their auspices (some of these are teens and others are six year olds).
Wesley came home and told his Dad how much they needed help - malaria and other diseases were prevalent and the mission looked after health care for those children coming to the club house.

Jim took a number of naturopathic medicnes to the mission location and taught one of the workers (Julius) to administer the drugs as needed. Of course, Jim was quickly made aware of how significant HIV and AIDS was a problem mostly for the parents of the children so he came back and did a significant amount of reading on the subject. He found a trace mineral which has been used successfully in the treatment of AIDS and discovered that it is used in animal feed here in Canada. I hesitate to mention the mineral here as further study is necessary and part of my role will be to publish some articles on the results.

Jim took some of the trace mineral to Nairobi on one of his trips (he now goes four times a year and has opened three additional slum locations to deliver medications for diseases like TB, Malaria and also HIV.

Jim told me of his work when he started and told me if it went well, he would want me to do some study. Last November he told me that of the first 150 patients (90 percent of them women), 149 had become symptom-free. He asked me to visit Kenya on my own coin and interview, set up data gathering, etc.

Thus, the 28th of March saw me flying from Capetown South Africa to Nairobi. I stayed at the Methodist Guest House as the Mennonite Guest House was booked over the Easter weekend. Since I was brought up in The United Church of Canada and my parents had been Mehtodist when union came about, methodism is my roots. I met with Julius the next morning. He took me to Soweto (not the Soweto in South Africa but one of the slums in Nairobi). He stayed with me when we were in public and warned me about safety (even so I had my camera stolen that day out of a zipped underarm bag).

In the coming days I visited slums at Lunga Lunga, South B, and Kibera. The latter was the slum featured in the movie The Constant Gardner (and that movie depicts the slum very much as it is). In the two weeks I was there, I interviewed a number of AIDS patients who had been on the trace mineral for anywhere form two weeks to two months. Some of the patients are on anti-retrovirals while others refuse to take the drugs.

The Kenya government tests CD4 and so we get the data on those tests. All the patients have had improvements in CD4 counts. Those on the longest found they got over minor aches and illnesses quite quickly and were able to work an 8 hour day again. The stories were quite interesting and the patients quite thankful.

In the Methodist Guest House I had the feeling it was a safe haven and a prison. Once there in the afternoon and through the two security guarded gates, I could not leave. It was safe as there were security guards in halls within the complex and when I wanted to give Julius something, they made him wait while I went to my room to get the item. I had access on-site to internet (when electricity and internet connection permitted) and had access to CNN, Al Jazeera, and two Christian TV stations. I found some of the North American TV evangelists. I was particularly impressed with the objectivity of Al Jazeera but one night as I was watching, the screen switched to some Swahili singing - so even the TV was unreliable.

Reading was my pass-time. I had a book entitled Jacob's Wound in which the author explores the homeroticism in the Old Testament. Focusing on the story of David and Jonathan with the temple boys, Saul and David etc. he makes a case for there being a simple accpetance of homosexuality in the old testament.

Jim is returning today from his second trip to Kenya since I was there. He will be bringin with him the 6 month data for me to start my analysis. The last time I met with Jim, he asked when I am going back. He wants to go at same time. I plan to go if I have to next June or July.

Jim views this as a mission. I view it the same way. My close childhood friend (the brother I never had) died of AIDS. I view my work as honouring God and honouring Ron. It is difficult for me to explain how close Ron and I were to each other between the gaes of 3 and University (to the exclusion of others) and yet neither of us realized our gayness.

I would like to close this post with something I wrote while in Nairobi .......

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I went to Lunga Lunga (another slum area) and sat inside All Nations Gospel Church (apparently African Pentecostal) while waiting to meet the pastor and meet with some of the people being treated with Selenium in that slum.

It was heart-rending to sit there with so little in the way of facilities. Such a contrast to the fancy useless buildings called Cathedrals in Europe . I just do not know how to describe the poverty here. I have been lonely most of my time here and feel threatened as a white man. The children in the slum all want to greet me – it is as if they have never seen a white man before.

Last night at dinner, for the first time, I met some people to talk to. There were two men from Canada from the Canadian Bible Society (one Sask. and one Newfoundland ). There was also a Methodist Bishop from England (I did not catch his area except it is on the border of Wales ). He was touring Rwanda and visiting missionaries there and will be doing some of that here – he was going north today to meet with some and will be back early next week. I had breakfast with him this morning as well.

I see such need here. First, the people running Jim’s project here are not being paid expenses (Jim leaves Julius some money each time he comes) and I have been paying Julius for transport so he can meet me in safe places and accompany me to the slums. I talked briefly with him about whether his local church pays towards the other people working the other clinics and he said he didn’t think so. Julius has a job with a missions teaching and they have been cooperative in giving him time for the project. Kim, whom I met yesterday has a job so has to take a day off to be available for the delivery of Selenium. Julius says his biggest expense is load for his phone (you buy load which pays for the time on the phone and when the time runs out, you buy more load). He says patients are always phoning him and he has to phone them back.

The pastor of the church drove us back downtown but I noted his car in bad need of repair. The brakes were not in shape at all. The church is tin strung together on tree limbs. They do have some light bulbs strung along the centre of the structure. It is sweltering inside this tin structure. There are some benches.

I am sure that a Canadian or US church which provided even $100 per month to such a church or to the operational expenses of Julius, Kim and the others working this project would be wonderfully helpful.

I am amazed at what people here do with so little.

BTW, Julius has invited me to go to his church which is the mother church of the one I was in yesterday for Easter services Sunday. I gladly accepted as I will meet his pastor who oversees several slum churches.

If you would ever like me to talk to a group at some point I would be willing to do so. Or if the local Lions, Kiwanis or Rotary are looking for a speaker, I would be willing to talk about Nairobi and the slums.

When I was in Sunday School, our Sunday School had a box where on your birthday you put the number of pennies of your age to help Dr. Strangway, a missionary in Africa . Once. Dr. Strangway came to speak. What an impression that made on me! I can not believe I am here now and I do feel this is a mission as much as it also involves my research. It only struck me yesterday though about how severe the need was and maybe I will give a talk somewhere about my experiences and about the needs here.

Kenya is stable (although not free of corruption). Kenya takes in refugees from the South of Sudan (where war is supposedly over). I talked with one of those refugees (a Christian) who had to wear a brace because of having been hacked by radical Islamists from the north of Sudan (the UN and Sudan have agreed to peace in that area of Sudan ). Somalia has been experiencing bombings from helicopters just north of the Kenya border (it dominates the news locally) and some of that bombing is in trying to destroy rebel strongholds and is done by a coalition of African nations at the request of the Somalia government. There are fewer refugees here from Uganda and Ethiopia . None come from Tanzania which is the only other country to border Kenya .

I believe that until we provide a means for these people to live – food shelter of a basic nature and soul enrichment, there will be no peace. They see us as rich beyond what they can imagine. Contrast that with the happiness and singing and joy I see in the people despite the poverty. The Methodist Bishop and I talked about that last night – it is a real conundrum to know why they show such joy despite the illness and danger they live in all the time.

Cheers

For me, today has been a rough day. The mall I go to every day I am in Manila was bombed killing 9 and injuring well over 100. The pictures in the various news media are all so real to me.

How does one deal with issues like war between religions? In 2005, as you will see in some of my other entries, I was at the Glroietta Mall (which is where the bomb was today) and took a taxi back to the apartment in Pasay City but when we turned on the TV when we got home, we discovered that two buses had been bombed within yards of where we had passed in the taxi just a short few minutes before.

The Muslim factions which are trying to gain independence in the south of the Philippines took responsibility for the bus bombings. It is suspected in the first news stories that this bombing is also the responsibility of those same militant groups.

In Africa I met a wonderful Muslim man who admitted to me he could not take the words of militant Muslims at face value - he kept saying it is a culture war, a war for political control and not a religious war. Is that true? I know I find militant Christians say some ridiculous things. Are they only going for political control?

I have used the term militant but they are sometimes called fundamentalists. They tend to believe in absolutes and they tend to be the ones who wish to interpret the absolute.

In my opinion, God wants us to be accepting of others. That does not mean that we give up on spirituality and our belief in God (after all, Christians, Muslims, and Hindus all believe in one God although they have very different ways sometimes in reaching the One God. My belief is extremely strong. I believe in God. I want to do what God wants. For me that means LOVE THY NEIGHBOUR.

Back to the bombing in Makati (Manila). I feel very strongly that prayer is needed for the victims of the bombing. BUT, I believe the greater need is for prayer that all over the world we will pray for conciliation between religious groups.

Oct. 19, 2007
DJ

January 1, 2005, I landed in Manila from Hong Kong. It was a new year and I was starting a new adventure. Arnold was there to greet me at the airport and much like the previous year, our meeting was outside. It was morning as the flight had arrived in Hong Kong at 6 a.m. and after 2 1/2 hours we had taken off for Manila. Arnold had been out the night before watching fireworks to celebrate the coming in of the new year.

We again went directly to the Intercontinental Hotel in Makati and rested before heading for Fridays for dinner. That was my second time arriving in Manila and it was the start of a tradition - the first night in Manila we eat at Fridays.

On the seocnd day, Arnold took me to Pasay City to show me the apartment. It shocked me. First, the street outside wqas so narrow. Then once one was out of the cab, there was a long gated walkway and then a locked gate which went into a cement area with apartments facing into this area. The families there were outside their apartments, washing children and clothes. Across this cement area were a set of narrow stairs and we climbed those to our apartment which was at the top (third floor) to the right. There was a gate there and then the door was immeidately behind the gate - there were three other apartments along this side and four along the left as well.

When we walked in, we were in an area which had a tabel for two, a TV, and at the end of the room a sink and counter with a propane double burner at one end of the counter and some open shelves above that which held pots, dishes and some small amount of food. To the immediate right of the counter was a door which led into a COMFORT room - a room with a porcelain commode, and a slightly lower area with a drain in it which had a shower curtain separating it from the toilet. On the floor in the area behind the curtain was a tub (like a large dishwashing tub) with a scoop with which to shower and flush the toilet. To shower, one throws water (cold) over ones self. To the front of the comfort room was a bedroom with a door on it - just large enough to walk into at the end of a double mattress on the floor (we also placed the fan there at night so we would be cool enough to sleep).

Having been used to Canadian comforts, I wondered how I would live here.

The next day we left the Intercontinental and I started to find out. I really liked the close quarters. This was an apartment building which was good for educated young people. Across the steps in the other building, their door facing ours was an identical apartment which five young University grads (all gay) shared so they could send money home to their families. Some of those young men have become real friends whom I see whenever I am in Manila. In fact, in 2007, Arnold and I hosted dinner for all of them and many of their boy friends - 11 of us in all.

The next three months this was my home. We visited Boracay very early in my stay for three nights. That is a beuatiful location but already there are tourists. One flies in a small plane to a dirt landing field, takes a tricycle to the boat and then takes a boat to get to Boracay which has three main beaches - although the white sand runs all the way along. We were going to the third beach where we took a North American style room - the hotel being across the street from the beach - the hotel served meals at the edge of the beach in the open so one had to cross the street to get to meals.

We went to Puerto Princesa twice. The first time because Arnold had a family emergency to tend to and the second because he was invited by the University to judge final student presentations.

During my stay, we also visited Baguio (the summer government location) and Olongapo (next to the area where the Americans had a naval base during the Vietnam war). That area where the docks are still has been made into a wonderful area of recreation - including some beautiful outdoor bars with the water lapping as you drink and listen to live music.

We had to go to Hong Kong so I could extend my stay - I had a 59 day visa which I could have renewed for some money (perhaps even some under the table). However, Arnold had never left the Philippines and we were able to get a two night tour of Hong Kong and Schenzhen at an extremely low price. We have a Hong Kong story too which I might share in another entry.

For the first time we attended mass together in Manila. There are a few English masses each weekend so off we were. I am NOT Roman Catholic but Arnold attended an RC University (and so did I as a matter of fact) and has tended to go to mass. His father was RC while his mother was evangelical. I was amazed at how many people were at mass - we stood in the side aisles but the service was broadcast outside and those who could not get into the aisles stood outside and participated.

During the visit, Arnold and I had our first Valentines Day together. We celebrated with a special meal and I embarrassed Arnold by carrying a bouquet of flowers in the taxi to our apartment. That taxi ride was at about 5:00 p.m. and when we listened to the 6 p.m. news, we discovered that two buses had been bombed just outside the mall - on the route we had just taken from that very mall to our apartment. Arnold would not let me take a city bus as he felt they were too unsafe. He also would not let me go to a market area which he felt was unsafe for me. One night in our neighbourhood, a couple of young guys knocked his neck with a bag of ice and when he fell, they graqbbed his cell phone and ran off.

Oone of the reasons I wanted to stay so long was to find out whether we were compatible under the conidition of living together. The magic of Sabang would not interfere with our growing together. Before I left we bought identical rings and we both wear them but that is another story.

Oct. 17, 2007
DJ